Wednesday, November 10, 2010

Joy and pain all rolled into one...



Tonight I took the boys to McDonald’s for dinner. Daddy is out of town, tomorrow is a holiday and well, mommy didn’t feel like cooking.

On the way there I switched from radio to cd and the song “If We Ever Meet Again” by Timbaland and Katy Perry came on. William immediately shouted, “Turn it louder mommy! I love this song!” He started to dance around in his car seat, arms waving, booty shakin’ and the biggest grin ever! I was laughing and loving every second of it until the chorus came on and repeated over and over:

___________________

I'll never be the same
If we ever meet again
Won't let you get away
If we ever meet again
This free fall, oh got me so, oh
kiss me all night,
don't ever let me go
I’ll never be the same
if we ever meet again

If we ever meet again,
I'll have so much more to say
(Say if we ever meet again)
If we ever meet again, again
I won’t let you go away
(Say if we ever meet again)
If we ever, ever meet again
I'll have so much more to say
(Say if we ever meet again)
If we ever, ever meet again
I won’t let you go away!

___________________

I am not a religious person at all. I have no idea if Claire and I will ever meet again. It really seems unfathomable to me. So many questions unanswered and who really knows? Yet the lyrics of this song hit me hard tonight and it is definitely not a song about loss so it took me by surprise. Tears instantly sprang to my eyes in the midst of having so. much. fun.

It was pitch black outside, William and I could hardly see one another yet he stopped dancing at one point and said, “Mommy? Why are you so sad?” Wow... how did he pick up on that?

I just told him that I was missing Claire and he said “Oh.” and there we were in the parking lot ready to move on into McD’s to eat.

Such an intuitive and sensitive little being.
Love him. Plain and simple.

XO
 
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